Jesus and the Joker

First of all if you haven’t seen The Dark Knight yet, stop reading this blog and go buy a movie ticket.  Once you’ve done that you’ll begin to understand a little of what this little rambling is all about.  

A couple of weeks ago Kate and I engaged in one of our favorite pastimes - seeing summer blockbusters.  We sat in a darkened room with 250 of our closest strangers and  watched an incredible performance.  Sure the movie as a whole was great, but if you’ve paid any attention to the entertainment media you will know that Heath Ledger stole the show.  The late actor played the part of the Joker like no one before has.  Everything about the role was classic.  The mannerisms and voice were something that I think deserve an Oscar nod.  

So why do I bring all of this up?  Well on the way home Kate and I were discussing how amazing Heath was in the movie and how it was sad that the world would never again get to see him don the sadistic smile of Batman’s arch enemy or any other role for that matter.  And then we started talking about how there’s a good chance that Heath will spend an eternity in darkness.  I honestly have no idea if he knew Christ or what he believed, I’m just assuming that he wasn’t a Christian.  However, deciding what to label Mr. Ledger isn’t the point of this blog.  

What convicted us the most was the fact that we were genuinely disappointed that Heath was gone, and how it would be sad to know that he might spend an eternity apart from God.  He seemed like he’d be a cool guy to hang out with.  But... here’s the kick in the teeth conviction part... how often do we not even think about the people we really know, like co-workers and friends who don’t know Christ.  They too will spend forever without true life and peace.  I mean I actually uttered the words, “It’s too bad someone didn’t share the gospel with him.”  (Now maybe they did, or maybe he really did know God and just wasn’t public about it.... again another blog for another day).  

So why, why, why.... does it not enter my mind more on a daily basis that the people I spend half of my life with at work might not know the Savior?  Why am I so calloused to not ask deep life changing questions? Why am I content to become part of the status quo and just have water cooler conversations?

After all eternity is no joking matter.

Football, Fractions, & Fatherhood

It has been a long time since I’ve written something for this blog. Due in part to the topic of this blog. For those that don’t know I became a teacher and coach at a middle school in west Fort Worth this past August. It has been four months of what can be best described as controlled chaos. I can definitely say that I have learned my share of lessons good and bad.

The most important thing that I’ve learned, however is the importance of fatherhood. When I’ve had a few seconds to reflect (which is amazing in and of itself if you know what its like to be a coach and teach 7th grade math) I keep coming back to the issue of fatherhood. I knew coming into teaching that I wanted to try and make a difference on a more personal level, but I wasn’t quite prepared for what I was walking into. Here are just a few comments that have occurred in my classroom or on the field this fall.

I’ve changed the names because I’m sure that’s some legal something that I’m supposed to do.

(If I ever get bored I’ll rail on the things that I think are stupid within our system)

- "Coach, which is farther away, Corsicana or Kansas? Because I think that Timmy doesn’t have to drive as far to see his dad in prison."

When asked to share something good that’s happened in their lives one girl in my class asked if she could instead share one of the worst moments in her life…

-"When I was seven my dad was drunk and hit me behind the ear with a broken beer bottle and now every year I have to get surgery to remove a tumor that keeps coming back."

- "Guess what Coach?! Tonight I get to go out to eat and meet my real dad. My mom just found out who my real dad about a month ago." This young lady is 12.

There are many more conversations and comments that keep telling the same story. There is a fatherhood crisis out there. I’d be shocked if more than 75% of my students lived with both their mom and biological dad. This is not news to many I know, but it blows me away how any father could abandon, abuse or neglect his own child. The life of a middle school coach is filled with long hours and little compensation. There are many nights (especially during football season) where all I want to do is go home and be lazy. I don’t want to be bothered and there’s not a bone in my body that’s unselfish. BUT I love my wife and my daughter and I know how important I am in their lives. Seeing my students and the situations they have to live in breaks my heart, but it also drives me to be a better father.

I’m thankful that I’ve been given the awesome privilege and responsibility of raising my daughter, humbled that hopefully I can impact even a few kids who don’t even know what a dad is for, and so incredibly grateful that I had such an awesome dad that was always there for any and everything that happened in my life. (And yes that last sentence was probably a run-on, but I’m a math teacher. If you want to talk about integers and improper fractions, bring it on!)

Still alive...

I haven't forgotten how to blog. There is one coming soon that's been brewing in my mind for the past few months. Stay tuned...

Lessons from my daughter

The past 7 months or so have been an interesting season in my life. If I had to pick one word to describe it would be uncertainty. We’re still working through the church question, still trying to sell our house and I’ll be starting a brand new career as a teacher in two weeks. Plus throw in a lot of other things and you arrive at what has seemed at times a very chaotic first half of 2007. So I’ve asked myself recently what I’ve learned, and the best lessons have come from my daughter Reese. Here are just a few...

- The most important thing to Reese is her time with Mommy and Daddy. She doesn’t really care all that much if her toys change and get fancier. She really cares about the givers and not the gifts. She couldn’t survive if all she had was her stuff and didn’t have Mommy and Daddy. That’s a lesson that I need to continually be reminded of in relation to the Giver of life.

- I tell Reese not to touch something and five minutes later she’s trying to touch it again. At first this frustrated me but then I realized that I can do the same thing to God when I make the same mistake over and over again. Thankfully God is very patient.

- Recently Reese has decided that she only wants to eat grilled cheese for lunch and dinner. She can get quite upset if we don’t give her the food she wants. But obviously we can’t just feed her grilled cheese. Reese doesn’t realize what she needs nutritionally. It’s my job as her father to make sure she gets what she needs even if she doesn’t like it at the time. I keep asking God for certain things, but haven’t seemed to have gotten them yet. Maybe He knows what I need instead of what I want?

- There are times when Reese gets scared because she thinks that I’ve left her. And perhaps I’ve left the room but I still know exactly where she is and I can hear her cries. She cries because her vantage point is not the same as mine. I’ve learned that in the same way I freak out and question what God is doing and if he knows how dire my situation is. The fact is that he knows exactly where I am even when I don’t know what He’s doing. Just because I can’t see Him doesn’t mean that He can’t see me.

It’s crazy how much you can learn from a little girl.

Heroes

Yes, "Heroes" is an incredibly creative television show surpassed only by the greatness that is "Lost". But it is not the subject of this posting. Webster defines a hero as...

'a man of distinguished courage or ability, admired for his brave deeds and noble qualities.'

Listed below are the men in my life who I consider my heroes. They inspire me and show me little glimpses of Christ.

In no particular order and by no means meant to be a way to paint a complete picture of who any of these men truly are.

Aaron McClung: My hero because he is a man of deep conviction, but also a man of proper action. He strives for excellence in all that he touches. One of the few men that I would say I agree with on matters of ministry without even knowing the topic.

Cory Kuhn: My hero because he defines both the words teacher and teachable. He is a guardian of truth and love who is never afraid to ask the hards questions, but only because he cares that much.

David Souders: My hero because he is truly compassionate and you never walk away from a conversation and feel that he doesn't care. Dave is also the definition of a servant.

Jay Mendenhall: My hero because it seems that he possesses all of the fruit of the Spirit at any given time. Jay is probably the best listener that you will ever meet and dishes out some pretty wise counsel too. Jay also made it possible for me to see my first glimpse of heaven on earth, or more commonly referred to as Wrigley Field.

Lanny O'Steen: My hero because of his zeal and passion for the lost. Lanny loves life and has an energy that is truly contagious. He's my hand twin and my wife thinks he runs really fast.

Matt Stewart: My hero because he is a true friend. Watch the Lord of the Rings movies and pay attention to the character of Samwise, or read about Jonathan in 1 Samuel and you will begin to get a glimpse of who Matt is. Matt was the first friend that showed up to the hospital the day my dad passed away. And on a lighter note he's a fellow super nerd and my wingman.

Travis Womack: My hero because he risks his life every day for the freedom of this country. And I've seen few people that are as hospitable as he is.

Mason Pounds: My hero because he's a motivator to those around him. And there are few times that Mason can't lift anyone's spirits with his crazy brand of humor.

Jimmy Perez: My hero because he does whatever it takes to see that his family and friends are taken care of. There is no one who I'd rather endure another category 4 hurricane with. Jimmy is also a Spurs fan, but I don't hold that against him.

Shea Sumlin: My hero because he helped me define what life is all about. Shea has a passion for ministry and discipleship that is rarely matched.

John Bryson: My hero because he is one of the greatest leaders and visionaries I've been around. And for sure one of the most humble leaders I've seen.

Tom Ferrell: My hero because he defines grace. You never walk away from Tom's presence and not feel that you were a little closer to Christ in the process.

Printess Baker(PawPa): My hero because he is a constant encourager and teacher. And it seems that he can fix anything.

J.W. Titsworth(Grandpa): My hero because he defines diligence and strength through restraint. He also instilled in me a love of reading.

Patrick Titsworth: My hero of heroes for more reasons than I can write.

Perspective

We’ve all heard the expression “glass half empty or glass half full” when trying to determine whether one is an optimist or pessimist. Honestly I think everyone is a little of both. We have our good days and our bad days. Isn’t it funny how you can hear news that gives you just a little bit of hope and your whole day turns around? For example, you’ve been trying to sell your house for months and you hear that someone looked at it today. In that instant your spirits pick up a bit and all seems to be right with the world. But the reverse is true as well. Everything is normal and then someone hacks into your bank account online and wipes you out. Your heart sinks and you think all is lost. In both cases not much has really changed. The person looking at the house is just looking and the wonderful people at the bank (did you sense the sarcasm there?) put all of the money back in 7-10 business days.

The only thing that changes many times is our perspective. Ultimately we can always look for silver linings in things and we can always find ways in which the grass would be greener on the other side. However, I think at the end of the day we have to realize what kind of perspective we have. It is helpful (though not always easy) to keep some semblance of an eternal perspective. In the end I won’t really care how many months it took my house to sell, how much interest I paid on debt that I owed, how many hours I sat in traffic coming home from work, or how many games the Rangers lost in 2007 (my prediction is 93). What will matter to me is did I love with fervor? Did I enjoy the unique moments in life that God gave me and did I do my best to honor him with them? And did I live my life with intentionality and passion? Because in the end this life is just blip on the radar screen of eternity. Hard to fully comprehend, but true nonetheless.

Correct Label?

There are many labels that people attach to themselves, but it can be difficult to ascertain whether these labels are correct. Words must continually be defined and redefined. There are many that label themselves as Christians, but you and I both know that not everyone who claims to be a Christ follower knows him. The same is true of those who label themselves as your friend. Today it seems that if you aren’t my enemy then you by default are my friend. However, I feel as though we need to give the word friend a better definition.

Friends can have discussions about more than just the latest (insert your favorite sport here) score or the latest episode of (insert your favorite TV show here) they watched last night. Friends can ask difficult questions and get honest answers. Friends continue to keep in contact with you even after you leave a church, job or any other place of common attendance. Friends are there to rebuke as well as encourage. Friends don’t mind going out of their way for you. Friends don’t hide behind masks. Friends drop everything when they are needed. Friends see your blind spots. Friends remember special occasions. Friends make up for the areas we are weak in. Friends are reliable. Friends aren’t shallow. Friends are there for times of laughter and times of sorrow, and they can pick up on both without a word being said. Friends are friends forever (ok that was meant to be a crack at the Michael W. Smith song, but it’s still true).

Ultimately “A friend loves at all times” and “No one has greater love than this – that one lays down his life for his friends.”

How many of our friendships really look like this?